You better watch out, you better not cry. You better not pout I'm telling you why

Calculus is coming, to town

He's make a list, he's checking it twice gonna find out who's posting like lice.

Calculus is coming, to town

He knows if you've been bluffing, he knows if you're a troll He knows if your posts smell like fish and he's going to burn your soul

Oh

He's making a list, he's checking who's wrong. Gonna find out who speaks with forked tongue

Calculus is coming to town

You better not sin, you better not boast. He's got a big flame and he's gonna make toast

Calculus is coming to town

He knows if you're a lezzie, he knows if you are gay but if you are a virgin pure, he will roll you in the hay.

Oh

You better not lie, in deed or in word. He's got hard cludgel and he likes to cross swords.

Calculus is coming to town.

You better watch out, don't call him a lous, unless you're a knight and are ready to joust

Calculus is coming to town.

He knows when you are sleeping, without your powdered wig. If he sees you with your waistcoat off, he will stick you like a pig.

Oh

You better not cheat, you better not lie. you better not lust, I'm telling you why...

Calculus is coming to town

You better not blame, you better not sin. Don't speak in red herrings or ad hominims

Calculous is coming to town

He knows if you are sleeping, or if you're playing dead. He sees you when your pants are down and he'll Kong you on the head.

Oh

You better not screw, you better not fudge. He's got a foul sword and a big, heavy cludge

Calculus is coming to town.